The arrival of my book and an illustrated rant on not being heard

So… I just wanted to quickly show my face on this blog – so you guys know I’m still here and haven’t been swallowed up by a sink-hole.

As many of you already know… my book is now printed (wooo-hoooooo!!!)… and all of my time has been spent on preparing backer’s packs and slowly (but surely) getting copies of the book out to every person who funded my crowdfunding, book-printing campaign.

Preparing the backer's packs...

Preparing the backer’s packs…

If you want to be kept in the loop about how to buy a book (regardless of whether you’re in South Africa or anywhere else in the world)… just drop an e-mail to (she’s my Admin-Queen… she’s good with money… she remembers to post things… she remembers to return phone-calls and e-mails!!).

I’ll do a *proper* book launch thingy (both physically and online)… ONLY after I’ve sent all the bits ‘n pieces to my backer-peeps.

I’m also working like a fiend on getting the new website up… because – it’s kinda silly (and typically shortsighted) of me to be sending out books – which advertise a website – that actually doesn’t EXIST yet!

Once the website is done… I’m going to transfer this blog to that site (it doesn’t really affect you guys – because even if you type in the old “live against the flow” URL – it will automatically plonk you on my new site).

So… *THAT* stuff… (plus renovating our house – again – and preparing it for Air B’nB)… and kids, and life, and birthday parties… is why I’ve been a bit scarce.

Anyhoo… here’s a little cartoon that I scribbled-up a while ago.

I drew it after a conversation with a woman I met in Durban who “heard” something entirely different to what I was actually trying to say.   Perhaps – there’s some of you can relate with this?

SnapseedSnapseed (1)Snapseed (2)Snapseed (3)Snapseed (4)

Anyhoo… there’s a whole LOAD of stuff that the Ranty part of my personality would like to say on the matter…  but… I’m not really in the mood for an argument with anybody – so I’ll just leave you with this last little scribble-thought of mine:

Snapseed (5)


And remember – if you want to e-mail me for whatever reason… or ask about the book… or what-not – my e-mail is:

H x

Do you long to be *got*?

I have this… issue.

I’m a pretty chilled, easy-going person… and it really takes a lot to raise my blood pressure.   I’m not highly-strung… I don’t like arguing with people… and I’m usually okay just to love and let live.

But one thing I really… really… struggle with (to the degree that it keeps me awake at night because I can’t stop obsessing about it)… is when I’m not *got*.

Am I the only person who needs so desperately to be “got”… to be “understood”… to be “heard”….? (??)

A good friend of mine recently posted a Seth Godin quote on his Facebook wall which said:

“It doesn’t matter if you’re right, it matters if you’re understood”.

Now – I don’t know what context that comment comes out of… but boy, do those words resonate with me!!

Because honestly… (and I mean this from the bottom of my heart)… I really don’t care much about being “Right”.

I’m a questioner.  I question everything… all the time.  I ponder things.  I chew on things.  And yes – with questioning comes a lot of movement and flow (when it comes to my opinions).  For me… learning and growth and understanding are a journey… a process… they’re not some stagnant zone of “Rightness” or “Wrongness”.  I just don’t see life that way.

I don’t care about being right… AND… I also don’t mind if people disagree with me (and again – I say this from the bottom of my heart).

It is not important that you AGREE with me…  it is important that you HEAR me – that you *GET* what I’m trying to say.

The one thing that drives me completely bonkers… is when somebody leaps to an incorrect conclusion about who I am – or about what I’m trying to say.

And they’ll say:  “So… what you’re actually saying is this…”

And I’ll say:  “No!  That’s not what I’m saying at all!!!”

And they’ll say:  “It absolutely IS what you’re saying!”

And I’ll say:  “No!  You’ve completely misread me!  You’ve completely misunderstood me!  That’s not at all what I’m trying to say!”

And they’ll say:  “Don’t try and back track now. Just admit it!  I KNOW what you’re trying to say!  You’re saying this….”


Those kinds of conversations (whether face to face… or through typed words flying across the internet) drive. me. absolutely.barking.mad… (!!!)

I want to tear my hair out… scream blue murder… roll myself in sackcloth and ashes… rip at my flesh… gnaw off my own digits… (well – you get the picture).


Is there anyone else out there that’s like me?  Do you also long to… need to… be *got*… and when people DON’T get you – and they misunderstand you… and mis-quote you… and jump to (entirely incorrect) assumptions about what they THINK you’re trying to say… do you go as barkers as I do?

C’mon… *whispers*… you can tell me!